What is your thought of the year

I read this question on Quora, and kept thinking for a while what would be the answer if i were to write one for it...

Empathy beats Ego…

This thought has come on and off in my head through the year. And I am trying to reinforce it in my life especially when I am at the end of the year, when I am having to go through difficult situations in life.

When you think of what the words actually mean; the problem of ego is a by product of being selfish by nature. Yes, we all are selfish all the time. I believe that the word selfless doesn't really mean anything and is kind of an oxymoron. Mostl people of the society think of only themselves and their family within the ambit of the 'self', whereas some extraordinary souls thought of the entire society within their self. They were able to see one of their own in the other person who is suffering in life. Hence, they had no second thoughts to help others in need. (I have written already on this and again reinforcing to myself - read here)

That exactly is what the word empathy means, you put yourself in others’ shoes and try to feel the pain. Well, I am neither trying to become Mother Teresa nor advising you to become one. But just think through it, you could avoid so many tiffs with may be a friend of yours or your partner, your mother in law or your colleague; maybe anyone only if you could realise that more than half of the problems in life exists only in our minds. The words that you speak in anger can cause irreversible change of the perception of you in the other person’s mind.

So always apply this thumb rule before you could react in adverse situations; why is the other person doing what they have done? how would you have reacted if you were to go through the same?

A little Empathy can beat the Ego in you to save most relationships.

Travel.. Traverse..Transcend

When i decided to resume writing my blog after an almost 5 year hiatus, i had promised myself that i must write at least once in a month. Well i already missed two months, but i am maintaining the photo blog as well in tandem. So i kind of console myself that I am not out of touch completely. "https://slate.adobe.com/cp/16VMy/" here is the proof !!

It takes much lesser effort in these because the major work i.e. capturing the beautiful images is taken care of by my husband. I do only the part of glorifying them in the easy to make templates of Adobe Slate (if you haven’t tried them I suggest you should, it is a wonderful medium to showcase your stories and easy at that too!). It started once when we were joking amongst ourselves that there should be a way where we can combine my love for writing and his passion for photography. And Voila! Thus was discovered Adobe slate. Guess I have promoted enough of Adobe on a Google product. This was not the intention when I began writing today.

There is a 3rd dimension to this thing which holds the key – the love for travel of my husband! 

Because of which all this has been possible. We haven’t explored a lot of places but the ones that we have been together have been very memorable so far. We have had our fair share of adventures and misadventures; joys and troubles and still managed to have fun all through it. He has been my travel buddy in every true sense. I wasn’t so much an outdoor person, but from when he has come into my life, I have seen, lived and experienced six different cities in India and also made our first trip abroad together.

I have grown up all my life in my hometown Chennai! It’s not that I haven’t been to places outside my home. I have been to a lot of places in South India, mostly with family on religious endeavors and a few times with friends. But I have merely gone there but not explored the place or culture or food. This has changed so much now. At the outset of every journey he would make thorough research about the various places to visit and all the different cuisines we shouldn’t miss (of course the food has the priority :P) "https://slate.adobe.com/cp/o7DJB/".

I have had the good fortune to enjoy all this with him everywhere (he has no choice now anyway ;)) we have been to. Thanks to all his efforts, I get to have all the fun (Ha ha :D). But on a serious note it has opened a new perspective in me truly. Differences in people, languages, cultures, cuisines have ceased to exist. They are merely various manifestations of the humanity at large. You get this amazing feeling of transcending the boundaries of the states and countries and still feel at home (but yeah the national and international roaming hurts a little... I work in the telecom sector now :P). I am beginning to realize how much I have missed these things in life and how blessed I am to enjoy all this forever in my life now!!

On this day, a year ago!! The day that changed our lives …

As I start to write on this day I wish to go as far as my memory can afford to recollect... to record and put down the run up to the events of the biggest turning point of my life. Feb 20th if I remember correctly … actually it goes a little before that too...maybe a week or so … the first time I hear of the name ‘Kannan’ … (little do I know then that it is going to be a part of my name soon !!) the first time I look at the picture …the obvious comments about his looks.. did it bother me so much..? no not at all.. I have myself never been a person who cares so much about external appearances. I frantically tried to search about him on social networks … seeking friend’s help to find mutual contacts. But unfortunately there was absolutely no information I could find..the fear of the unknown, it always drives me crazy. With the limited inputs my dad gave I agreed to for the official “sightseeing :P” … Yeah that was the fateful Feb20th .. the day that was about to change my life... forever!!
The first meeting: - yea I was anxious obviously, all the more because the descriptions that my dad gave didn’t particularly interest me…. ‘He is a very “good” guy, very quiet and no bad habits.’ I agreed to this session partly because they are coming all the way from Mumbai, the entire family. Even though I so hate this coffee giving bajji sojji eating thing happening at home, I at least thought the embarrassment would be restricted to my home. However they insisted on meeting outside, and the venue had to be a common place, hence was decided to meet in a temple. So there I was all dressed up in a saree with lots of jewellery, feeling like a bride already. The temple was fairly empty thankfully. We were waiting and here they come.
Oh the first look... as my eyes frantically searched among the crew of people that had landed, there he was my prince to be, in a pure white shirt and jeans (always!!). He was wearing glasses so I was not sure if our eyes actually met for that split second but I would like to assume that way... so filmy it sounds, I know :P yea totally like 2 states! Bollywood meets Kollywood... Vadapav meets Idli (to say it in my foodie husband’s style :P). After initial introductions finally we get our time and the first thing he says is we actually have a mutual friend. What!! he knows all about my social network... my likes and dislikes but I didn’t know a thing. I just proved to myself yet again I am such a moron when it comes to the virtual world. So then he starts speaking about himself. Loves to travel.. recently went to ladakh and all that… he knows that I love to read.. as always I am like I want to go to Sydney :P. After random talks for a few minutes and going around the temple we separated to go back to our families. And then came the moment … and we said YES!! I do remember it quite well, I looked at him one time sideways as my parents were anxiously waiting for my response. I smiled and thought to myself, yes this is it …and it was done. I didn’t speak to his parents so much, but his sister... omg she was so talkative nonstop asking me so many things. I was taken aback a little, didn’t know how to handle this. But I knew it was way too early and I should not be judgmental. Later I realized it really paid me off well for me being open and welcoming. Now I am part a wonderful new family with this awesome person as a partner for my life and I feel blessed!!

Whispers of the soul


Silvery streaks of light 
   from the waning moon,
   cast upon the hazy night;
Causing my head to swoon.

Waves lapping at the gravel
   with the chilling breeze,
Thoughts in my mind unravel;
   in the moment I freeze.

Silence of the seas defines its charm,
   whispering lullabies of love and peace;
As the eyes soak in the calm,
   all apprehensions begin to cease.

Deeper than the mighty water
   seems the love in your heart;
Even if not a word you utter
   our souls can never be apart.